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December 31, 2014
My New Year's Resolutions
- I will take a yoga or Pilates class and not be a spastic ass. This also means I can't mock the Crossfit classes held outside.
- I will try oil pulling. And remember not to use the sink as a spittoon. Maybe.
- I am going to be the newest blogger for People magazine. Camila Alves showcased holiday kid-friendly recipes--one of which was popcorn balls. One popcorn ball looked like a shit-faced Frosty the Snowman. So, I know I have a chance. Have a look see: http://greatideas.people.com/2014/12/22/camila-alves-holiday-kids-recipes/
- When I do blog for them, I am going to have my head shot be THIS. Because, why not.
- I will send my book to Mila Kunis. She will immediately love it and have Ashton promote it. I will dedicate it 'To Wyatt, Love Always---M'
- I will snowshoe. And go dog-sledding. And ice skate. And will not complain about the cold. ( Insert maniacal laugh here)
- I will read one book a month and not skip to the end after only reading twenty pages.
- I will remember to send the kids to school with valentines and candy. I will squelch the guilt when they come home with a personalized, crimson, edible, cookie heart pendant that was made with fairy dust and love.
- I will be thankful everyday. I will be grateful everyday. I will envision someone other than Stuart Smalley from SNL when doing this.
- I will stop going to the gym late at night.My attention span wanes when all I do is stare at the people working out who wear jeans. Or don't wear socks. Or shoes. Or read massive text books while running. Boxer-undershirt-sweating-like-a-pig-guy has the right to work out too.
Teacher by trade. Mom. Wife. Flunked Girl Scouts.
